Everything Happens for a Reason. Have Faith, sayang

I Miss My Budak Busyuk

Busyuk face

I miss you, sayang mama. You are at umah Opah right now, and I thought I'm gonna have a great time catching up with work now that you're out of my way. But guess what. I'm down with fever since yesterday, missed 2 days of work and now I'm still so light-headed and I can't digest anything I read since this afternoon.  The only productive and meaningful thing I've done so far is sleep and sleep like the world is never going to end. Arrggghh...

So I if I tell you what's on my mind, hoping that one day you'll read this and be reminded how much you've been the one that matters to me, I'd feel so much better about myself afterwards. At least I've done something to remind you, that even nothing else in this world worked for me, YOU always do. You keep me sane, motivated,  and when no one looked up to me as if I matter, you always make me feel... significant. And that always keep me going no matter how tough things coming my way.

Thank you, sayang, I hope you know that you are a big chunk of me. And I'm kinda lost without you. I love you so (and that's putting it ever so lightly).

Sleepless nights

Lately I am having trouble sleeping. Actually I think it started 2 weeks ago, the week that I had migraine every morning the whole week. N then i had flu, and now alhamdulillah, I don't have flu anymore, but I still am having trouble sleeping. I would be wide awake till i would finally managed to fall asleep around 3.30am, after tossing and turning countless times beside you and abah since 12am. And while trying to fall asleep, I keep having this headache. Mild, but seasick like..you know the one that makes you feel like youre on a boat or something. And it usually gets worse in the morning, when its time to wake up and we have so much thing to do getting you ready for school and all.

I am actually kind of worried now. What is wrong with me, sayang? At first i thought it was my tonsilitis. But since we have met the ENT specialist and now im taking antibiotics, and nothing had change since, I cant help thinking that its not tonsilitis anymore. well maybe it is, only maybe it had spread to other parts of my head. i hope so. hope its nothing worse than that. :-/

Well we would find out in 2 weeks time now, wont we? i am due for CT scan once ive completed the antibiotic course.

InsyaAllah, its just something treatable. I am sorry if this worries you, but maybe by recording bout my medical record, you can benefit from it too one day, for reference.

I love you, aliya. I pray for only the best for you. You know I do <3 :-* Kalau mama tanya you today, " you tau tak mama sayang you sooooo much?" you would say
" i know" dengan muka bangga dan konfiden yang amat sangat. And mama pun akan senyum sebab happy :-)


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